thoughts....in..in..in...out.out.out

Listening to an album of Tibetan Throat Singing, and wandering around town. 
the people at the library seem much more like Muppet's than usual, and i sit 
by the window and watch as the trains roll in and out like title waves of metal.
there is a boy with his face smashed in, dried blood on his lips, looks stretched
like he was made out of clay. His hand is wrapped in bandages, and his father is 
pocked marked, and his mother is overweight in sweatpants. they are asking 
sweetly where to find a particular movie to the counter clerk. the windows are
reflecting the elevator lights as the move up and down, but those lights are really
bombs waiting to hit upon the hill close to my house, it makes me squirm and i 
remember i just have a really active imagination. i was worried about my girlfriend
and thinking about how sad i would be if there would not be a bed to snuggle under
the sheets with her.  

 i have decided to finally love people, and it is hard because i can feel so much more 
hate surrounding me that i cave in oh too often. i meditate, and i try to forget about the
outside world, i look in, in, in. i exercise and try to push out, out, out, of my body. i can 
feel the claustrophobia of my body again, but it is not as bad. i know i finally belong here.

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